Biblical Parenting

A lot of good stuff I have been learning but just some little things I would like to share.

You know parenting these days is so goofy and certainly not biblical. Parent's are so worried about the child's psyche and self-esteem and being friends with them that they give a young child too many freedoms.

Think of an upside down funnel. Very wide at a young age with little restrictions or rules, the child has way too many freedoms. As the child becomes a teen the parents are frustrated with the way they are turning out, so they get very strict and try to control them. Like the narrow end of a funnel the teen is often choked and rebells and the train wreck ensues. There is a battle for control that the parent has lost years ago.

The biblical model turns the funnel the other way around. More control of a young child teaching them obedience and as they grow and mature they get more freedoms until they become their own person.

This is a very general guideline, but let me share the phases of biblical parenting.

The discipline phase happens from birth to age 5 or so. They don't understand moral reasons behind why things should be done, but we teach them obedience to protect them from harm and to teach them proper outward behavior.

Next the Training phase from around ages 6-12. We begin to direct their course giving the moral reasons for why we should obey. Here we start to work on the heart issue of why we obey. We now give reasons why and instruct them in the ways of living a proper life in the Lord's eyes.

Then the coaching phase from ages 13-19 years. They now begin to live more independently and you allow them to fail and help correct them, instruct them and cheer them on and discipline as needed but it's more about their heart and their thought processes for how and why we obey God and how we live a practical everyday Christian life.

Finally the friendship phase. The end result is a sweet relationship with a child that loves and respects you and you love and respect them. Ultimately two adults who have had hearts changed by Christ living for Him and enjoy life in His service together.

I strongly recommend Shepherding a Child's Heart by Tedd Tripp

There is SO much here I don't know how I could possibly share all the great stuff I have learned over the last few years, but I will try my best to pass along some of the highlights.

Here's the bottom line. You must have a heart converted by Christ by repentance and trusting in His death for your sins. You must FIRST live the life yourself. Then from a life of walking "in the Spirit" as apostle Paul says, you will guide and teach your children in the way you are walking. They will learn from your life and patterns. You can't say one thing and live another before them. They are no fools....then they just learn to be hypocrites. Little pharisees who only obey outwardly around other people....that's not good. The goal is to win your child's sinful heart over to Christ. We want them to live a proper life of faith.

If you have some questions, pass them along....I'm no expert but just like everything else here, I only am sharing what I am learning.

Love you and have a great day!


Jason Younger
Letters In Grace
heavenisafreegift@yahoo.com
http://lettersingrace.blogspot.com/